Christine Pao

I meet you where you are, and we look deeper before we try to fix anything. We look at how you came to relate to yourself this way, and at the old beliefs and cultural stories that have organised your life. For many people that includes the pressure to perform, the guilt of resting, and the job of being the reliable one in the family.

The way I work is depth-oriented and integrative. With individuals I use cognitive behavioral therapy to look at the mental loops and invisible rules in perfectionism and over-functioning. I use acceptance and commitment therapy so there is room for a hard feeling, and then a step that comes from your values rather than only from what other people expect. I pay attention to the body, because burnout and anxiety often show up as tension or numbness, not only as thoughts. In the relationship between us, we can notice how you show up with people outside the room.

With couples I use integrated behavioral couples therapy. We work on accepting differences and on changing the pattern, not only on solving the latest argument. I do not take a side between you.

I start with a 15-minute consultation so you can ask questions and see whether we are aligned. You tell me what is bringing you, and I tell you how I work. If we continue, I do not jump to solutions. I meet you where you are, and we look at where the problem comes from and which patterns keep you stuck. For couples, we begin with a joint meeting about your goals, what is hard now, and your history together. I then meet each of you separately to hear your own history and perspective. After that we have a feedback meeting and agree the path forward. I stay on the side of the relationship, not on one partner's side.

I do my closest work with high-achieving Asian Americans who are quietly burning out, caught in perfectionism or people-pleasing, or carrying family expectations they have not had space to look at. Many are in their 20s and 30s, taking on more responsibility and a major life change. I also work with new parents, and with professionals in demanding work, who want their worth separated from how much they produce. For couples, I often work with Asian American and multicultural partners who want to change how they communicate, have fewer repeating fights, and feel closer. I also see adults and people 65 and over.

I bring the ear of a second-generation Taiwanese American who grew up between cultures, and who knows the pressure to be the responsible one. People who know me describe me as calm, thoughtful, and introspective. In the room I am warm and collaborative. I completed predoctoral and postdoctoral work at the Rocky Mountain Regional VA Medical Center. That mix is how I keep both the person and the cultural context in view.

I am a licensed psychologist in Texas. I completed the Counseling Psychology program at the University of Houston in 2020, after my predoctoral internship. I also hold an M.Ed. Counseling from the University of Houston and a B.A. English and Psychology from Rice University. The work has been with high-achieving professionals, Asian American clients, couples, and new parents, around burnout, anxiety, family expectations, and relationships.